A normal kind of thing

I took a walk this evening. Not a long walk. Nothing special. Not to anywhere in particular or for any specific reason. Just a simple, short walk around the neighborhood. Not even the entire neighborhood, in fact. Just a tiny bit. We're talking a walk that used to take a couple of minutes. Five minutes, tops. I don't know how long it took me today, but it was a lot longer than five minutes. I considered timing myself before hand, but opted not too. I just needed to feel normal. Whatever normal might mean. I wanted to be able to get out of my house like any other person can and just move wherever my feet would go. And so I did. I'm not going to lie, it took a long time and it hurt pretty badly. A good part of my tried convincing me not to go at all, and when I did start it insisted that I turn back home. But I was adamant that I do something, move, in the evening sun. I just wanted it to be like last summer, before I got so sick with the bone infection. I also wanted to prove to myself that I could do it and to see how far I could go. So I did, and it felt good despite the pain in my leg. It was good pain, if that makes any kind of sense. It's hard to explain to people who have never had chronic medical problems, but those of you who have will understand. It is a pain that had a purpose (bone growing and hardening inside my leg) and that will lead to an ultimate goal - walking painfree, unaided and properly. One day it will happen.

For right now a short walk around the block is good enough. I just wanted to mark the occasion (as much of an un-occasion it actually is, after all it is just walking), because it was a big deal for me. My first purposeful walk outdoors without crutches in ten months. Just me, my feet, the sun and my cane. Glorious. I never want to forget how good re-discovering these little things feels.