O.k.
That is kind of morbid. But I am serious. Duct tape
and garbage bags are amazing things when your leg is stuck in a cast that can’t
get wet.
My immediate concern after surgery was pain control.
Then I focused on the never discussed but highly important task of getting my
plumbing working again (thank you very much narcotics and immobility for
introducing me to the wonderful world of suppositories… not!). And after that,
once I was home, all I was concerned with was being as comfortable as possible.
But there is a point when you start to emerge from
that post surgery period and start being semi-normal again, and that point
requires you to focus on personal hygiene. Not that I wasn’t performing hygiene
for a good two weeks or so after surgery, but sponge baths just don’t cut it. Neither
does simply washing your hair in the tub with the removable shower head, as you
lean forward on one good leg, trying not to tumble over the edge of the tub
while also keeping your casted leg dry.
The problem with personal hygiene when you require
crutches is that everything takes ten times longer than it normally would. It
also takes loads of extra energy. Being on crutches + leg in a cast that can’t
get wet + lack of energy + doing things that take more time and energy than
normal = forget it, I can’t be bothered. I mean it. We are talking about someone who
spends almost twelve hours a day sleeping and even after that is pretty
knackered throughout that day. So the act of bathing is like the highlight of
my day, or week… however often I actually get to it instead of washing hair in
the sink or sponge baths.
Oh! Also add the pain and discomfort of moving your
injured/affected leg into the tub and the fear (not completely irrational) of
slipping and hurting yourself even worse. That doesn’t help anything either.
When I was healthy, bathing was no problem. I never
had to think about it. Simply grab a couple of towels and a wash cloth, get
together some clean clothes, and you are good to go. Not so easy on crutches.
Here is how showering usually works (at least for me) at the moment:
1) Find
someone to grab you some clean towels and wash cloths, place a shower
chair/foot stool/ large cooler/or whatever it is you use to sit in the tub, and
bring you a garbage bag.
2)
While awkwardly leaning over a
drawer while trying to support yourself on one crutch, fish around for clean
clothing. Don’t forget anything. This is important. You forget your clean
panties and you might as well just give up. Way too much effort to dry off, get
pants on, hobble to your room, remove said pants, then find underwear, put that
on, and then get your pants back on, only to hobble back to the bathroom for
the rest of clothing you left there… well, unless you don’t mind crutching
around your house in your birthday suite. I wouldn’t recommend this if you live
with other people
3)
Actually move all that clean
clothing to the bathroom, making sure you place it close to the toilet, where
you will inevitably end up sitting as you dry off and get dressed.
4)
While sitting on the toilet, lid
down of course, undress yourself. You will need to sit down to remove your underwear
and pants. Getting these off will require you to lift your good leg off the
ground, and you don’t want to tip over or catch yourself with your bad leg,
unless you don’t mind pain or re-injury.
5)
Grab your duct tape and scissors
(I keep these in the bathroom) and the garbage bag your significant
other/family member/roommate/etc. lovingly got you. These will keep your leg
nice and dry. Don’t be stingy with the tape either. Trial and error over the
years has taught me that the less tape you use, the higher the chance that your
leg will get wet. Better use a bit too much and have some piece of mind than
use too little and end up with a sopping wet cast. Nobody likes the smell of a
wet cast. And anyways, Duct Tape isn’t that expensive. I get my rolls cheap at
the Dollarama, 2$ per roll, and they come in fancy colours and patterns. You
can stock up quite cheap.
6)
Transfer from the toilet to the
side of the tub, and from there to the shower chair/foot stool/large
cooler/whatever item you will be sitting on in the tub. Make sure you have an
anti-slip matt in the tub. Mine is a rubber crocodile from IKEA. The last thing
you want is to slip and hurt the other leg. I like to keep my casted leg up on
a ledge at the side of the tub that is a little bit higher than whatever I am
sitting on. This way, if any water does get through the duct tape, it will just
collect at the base of the garbage bag and I can drain it out once I have
finished my shower before I lower my leg from the ledge, thus preventing a
nasty icky wet cast.
7)
Shower! Finally. The whole
process of showering takes way too long to do every day, so don’t be afraid to
take your time. This is where all that extra duct tape comes in – your cast will
stay dry longer and the tape will provide the security that yes, you can stay
in the tub for five extra minutes. I recommend a removable shower head. Makes
life a lot easier. I also recommend doing everything at once – wash hair, body
wash, shave, loofah, whatever it is you do to stay clean. There is no “I will
use the loofah tomorrow” because chances are you won’t be showering again
tomorrow.
8)
Turn off the water. Dry off as
much as possible while still sitting in the tub. Dry as much of the garbage bag
around your leg while you are at it.
9)
Then carefully, very very carefully,
transfer from your seat to the side of the tub, then to the toilet. If
necessary, get something you can’t slip on and put it on the tiled/laminate
floor outside the tub so that your wet good foot doesn’t skid out from under
you.
10) Remove
the garbage bag and tape from your leg, being careful not to let the water on
the outside get onto the cast. Removing the tape may or may not be painful
depending on how much body hair you have.
11) Dry
off and get dressed. Brush hair. Apply make-up if desired (Yeah, not if I am
going right back to bed and binge watching Netflix), and any lotions you desire.
I highly recommend using lotion on your hands and feet, and even under your
arms where the crutches can rub from using crutches. Your under arms and hands
might get calluses from the crutches, and your good foot might too from taking
the grunt of your weight as you crutch along. The toes on your casted leg will
get dried out as the outer layer of skin dies off and can’t be removed because
you can’t shower/loofah/get that leg wet.
12) Clean
up the bathroom as much as safely possible e.g., put dirty laundry in hamper,
hang up wet towels, etc. This leaves less work for your significant
other/family member/roommate/etc. who probably already has to help you with everything else.
Those are the twelve steps of showering when you
have your leg in a cast. Once done, you can collapse back into bed, exhausted but
clean. Congratulations! Other than getting out of the house for doctors’
appointments, you have probably accomplished the biggest thing you will all
week.
As time goes on, this process will take less and
less time. It will become just as routine as showering when you were
healthy/uninjured always was. And you will probably find ways to tweak the
routine a bit, adding or taking steps out as needed. Not everything listed above
is applicable to everyone. For example, some people have casts they can walk
in. Depending on your situation, you might be able to stand in the shower, thus
eliminating the need for said shower chair/foot stool/large cooler/etc., or you
can grab your own towels and garbage bag. Whatever works best for you!
I thoroughly enjoy a good shower with piping hot
water and a nice body wash. Your body has likely been through a lot since your
injury and it is using a lot of energy trying to heal itself. You deserve to
treat yourself and feel good, and I think that being clean helps achieve that.
I almost always feel better, albeit still tired most of the time, after I have
showered. Then I spend some quality time with a book or word puzzle and a nice
cup of tea. It is worth the extra energy it takes to shower. You’re probably
going to be tired anyways, so you might as well feel good about it.
One clean happy girl!
One clean happy girl!
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